Comments on: Scarab Poem http://www.25hourwatch.com/2010/06/21/scarab-poem/ Not all that useful for telling time, no... Wed, 19 Oct 2011 19:41:16 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Bridget http://www.25hourwatch.com/2010/06/21/scarab-poem/comment-page-1/#comment-394 Bridget Fri, 02 Jul 2010 14:39:15 +0000 http://www.25hourwatch.com/2010/06/21/scarab-poem/#comment-394 I’ll be honest; I find the overall form of this poem too disjointed for my liking. I prefer the line-phrase style used in some of your previously posted work. You’ll have guessed by now that I’m a fan of poetic forms that possess discernable patterns, and the seemingly random way “Scarab’s” stanzas are divided confounds me. This, of course, is personal preference. Additionally, I’d like to see reworking of the lines/phrases/images. Much of the poem just doesn’t have a finished feel to it yet. I do particularly like the line “prayers balanced against a feather”, and the important integration of rebirth provides a cyclical end to a poem that begins with “creation”. A very cool concept the whole way through, and I’d love to see a more developed version, regardless of formal style ;) I’ll be honest; I find the overall form of this poem too disjointed for my liking. I prefer the line-phrase style used in some of your previously posted work. You’ll have guessed by now that I’m a fan of poetic forms that possess discernable patterns, and the seemingly random way “Scarab’s” stanzas are divided confounds me. This, of course, is personal preference.

Additionally, I’d like to see reworking of the lines/phrases/images. Much of the poem just doesn’t have a finished feel to it yet. I do particularly like the line “prayers balanced against a feather”, and the important integration of rebirth provides a cyclical end to a poem that begins with “creation”. A very cool concept the whole way through, and I’d love to see a more developed version, regardless of formal style ;)

]]>